Respectful and non-intimidating engagement with new dogs

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Respectful and non-intimidating engagement with new dogs

Updated Dec 8, 2024

Dear Cathy,

Your suggestions to James C. in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, who was having problems bonding with his daughter’s dog, were good ones, including bringing a special toy for the dog and helping walk or feed the dog while visiting. I also found avoiding eye contact with my in-laws’ dog helped tremendously. The dog was intimidated by my presence, but avoiding eye contact minimized that problem. Shortly after, the dog laid down near me on the couch, gave me a few kisses on the hand, and let me pet her while she fell asleep. I think if James tries this method, he just may achieve the results he’s seeking.

– Howard R., Hermosa Beach, California

Dear Howard,

While I advised James to just be present and not engage the dog until the dog was ready to come around, I checked and I didn’t tell him to avoid eye contact, which is good advice when meeting any new dog. Personally, I don’t engage a dog unless a dog engages me. People think that’s odd since I work in the animal world, but I think it’s a respectful way to gain the trust of our animal friends.

Cathy M. Rosenthal is a longtime animal advocate, author, columnist and pet expert who has more than 25 years in the animal welfare field. Send your pet questions, stories and tips to moc.tidnuptepobfsctd-6b1937@yhtac. Please include your name, city, and state. You can follow her @cathymrosenthal

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Cathy Rosenthal (aka The Pet Pundit), CHES, CFE

Animal Welfare Communications Strategist, Writer & Educator

Cathy M. Rosenthal is an award-winning humane educator and author, animal welfare strategist, pet columnist, and speaker who has spent more than 38 years working in animal welfare with local and national humane organizations. She helps people better understand and care for animals through her nationally syndicated My Pet World column and has been the longtime pet columnist for the San Antonio Express-News since 2003.

In addition to her writing, Cathy develops humane education, leadership, customer service, and compassion fatigue training programs for animal welfare organizations nationwide, and has helped raise millions of dollars through grant writing, strategic communications, and program development.

Cathy is the editor and curator of Humane Perspectives: Leadership in Animal Welfare and is the author of several books, including Grant Writing Boot Camp for Animal AdvocatesThe Lucky Tale of Two Dogs, and The Happy Tale of Two Cats, which was the 2026 winner of the Association of Professional Humane Educators’ (APHE) "Educator’s Choice Award" for Best Humane Education Book for Young Children. She also received the 2026 APHE Nathania Gartman Heroes Award for Impact in Humane Education. Her humane education programs in Texas have reached more than 45,000 elementary school children since 2019.

She resides in Texas with her husband, their cat Sterling, and a former community cat, Maddie, who successfully negotiated an indoor living arrangement but still considers human affection highly negotiable.

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